Femme Invisibility?

girl_dee · 03-21-2012, 01:14 PM

Replace "DUDE" with "FEMME"

princessbelle · 03-21-2012, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee

Replace "DUDE" with "FEMME"

Not bad but i have bangs.

girl_dee · 03-21-2012, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by princessbelle

Not bad but i have bangs.

ohhhh we can fix that!

girl_dee · 03-21-2012, 01:21 PM

"FEMME" would fit very nicely there!

Gemme · 03-21-2012, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee

"FEMME" would fit very nicely there!

In the grill or on the chin???

girl_dee · 03-21-2012, 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

In the grill or on the chin???

OK.......

CherylNYC · 03-21-2012, 02:36 PM

I'm very much a tomboy, and not a high femme at all, except when I dress up for dates and events. I was at a leather event sharing a hotel room with a butch couple who know me as a femme lesbian, and their friend needed a place to stay for the last day of the event. She was a nice butch with some serious health issues, who was living on a shoestring budget, and not young.

Of course she was welcome to stay in the room at no charge since we three had already budgeted and paid. I made her a completely chaste offer of the other half of my queen hotel bed. She said, very strongly, that she preferred to sleep on the floor. She woke up at 4 AM with a serious asthma attack from sleeping on the floor. I demanded that she get up off the floor and sleep on the other side of my bed, threatening that I would sleep on the floor unless she got off it. Thankfully, that did the trick, and she spent a few restful hours in a proper bed.

I later asked my roommates what that was about. They had told the asthmatic butch that I was a big old dyke, but she had insisted that she was NOT going to sleep in a bed with a straight woman! She was quite sure of it. I HAD to be straight. WTF?

Martina · 03-21-2012, 04:28 PM

Butch femme folk think i am too andro to be femme. Yet regular lesbians think i am straight.

By the time i have given an andro lesbian enough significant looks for her to get that i am also a dyke, she thinks i am coming on to her.

Oh joy.

1QuirkyKiwi · 03-22-2012, 07:26 AM

I went to lunch with the managing FDs wife and I mentioned about being an invisible Femme (I explained what it meant). She said to me that when we first met when I was a student, she would never have guessed I was gay. She saw me almost like a Porcelain Doll; as innocent! She also admitted that although she’d heard whispers that I was gay, her experiences of gay women were Andro and Butch, so she believed them to be vicious rumours against me because I was well liked there.

Fast forward several years to now, having worked closely with everyone, again, she has observed that when I’m eyeing up a Butch, I’m not obvious about it…..it’s subtle. What she has also observed is that, Boi’s, soft Butch’s, Andro’s and other Femmes pick up on my ‘signals’. She still sees me as a Porcelain Doll!

This explains why I get a lot of interest from other Femmes. No offence is intended towards Butch’s when I say this; the ‘signals’ that I send out and maybe many of you Femmes who are seen as straight are far too subtle for them to pick up! It seems we need the 4x4s that Cajun dee has suggested! LOL!

There’s a new business venture; Cajun dee’s Butch Attention Grabbers! LOL!

Quintease · 03-22-2012, 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1QuirkyKiwi

This explains why I get a lot of interest from other Femmes. No offence is intended towards Butch’s when I say this; the ‘signals’ that I send out and maybe many of you Femmes who are seen as straight are far too subtle for them to pick up!

I'm not subtle at. all. when I like someone. Trust me, it's worthwhile being forward.

It's ironic as I'm not confident at all, I'm social awkward, hate confrontation, struggle to hold peoples gaze unless I'm actively conversing with them and get really anxious around people I like. I'm also an extrovert, so when I like someone, whether it be a friendship or romantically, I can't help myself. I want to get in their face, I want to talk to them, I want them to notice me and want them to remember my name. People like attention so it's always worked.

I always worked on the principle that once someone knows who you are, then anything is possible.

1QuirkyKiwi · 03-22-2012, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quintease

I'm not subtle at. all. when I like someone. Trust me, it's worthwhile being forward.

It's ironic as I'm not confident at all, I'm social awkward, hate confrontation, struggle to hold peoples gaze unless I'm actively conversing with them and get really anxious around people I like. I'm also an extrovert, so when I like someone, whether it be a friendship or romantically, I can't help myself. I want to get in their face, I want to talk to them, I want them to notice me and want them to remember my name. People like attention so it's always worked.

I always worked on the principle that once someone knows who you are, then anything is possible.

I’m a complete contradiction; I’m comfortable within myself and fairly confident, and certainly not backwards in being forwards, as well as being extroverted and annoying cheerful, bubbly and happy (apparently, lol!). When I’m with people I know; whether at work or in my private life, my presence is felt, but, not in an in forceful your face kind of way.

But….. I hate confrontation and don’t like social settings with lots of people, preferring small gatherings. I’m not awkward socially, I just don’t like being around too many people at one time. I’m not easily intimidated by people and I’m not nervous or anxious by nature unless there’s a need to be (if that makes sense?)
When I’m chatting to someone I’ve just met, I’m still bubbly and talkative, only I lower my head slightly and look up at them, then look away to the side whilst smiling with my mouth closed.

Half of my problem is my thick accent; I’ve had to learn to ‘tone’ it down when I speak to people who aren’t used to my accent (basically sound more English English) over the years for people to understand what I’m saying and that does take a fair amount of effort to do to hold a conversation.

Quintease · 03-22-2012, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CherylNYC

I later asked my roommates what that was about. They had told the asthmatic butch that I was a big old dyke, but she had insisted that she was NOT going to sleep in a bed with a straight woman! She was quite sure of it. I HAD to be straight. WTF?

What a dick, I would have left her on the floor.

I've had boyish gay women insist I must be bisexual or straight before, interestingly they were nearly always single.. Perhaps a lack of social skills?

1QuirkyKiwi · 03-21-2012, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee

Replace "DUDE" with "FEMME"

Is the Shredded Wheat-Comb over Hair style that goes with compulsory?

Christy51274 · 03-21-2012, 01:31 PM

Cajun_Dee, you're a riot! LOLLL

03-21-2012, 01:21 PM	#4
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,829 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	Chin tat? "FEMME" would fit very nicely there!

03-21-2012, 02:36 PM	#7
CherylNYC Member How Do You Identify?: Stonefemme lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: I'm a woman. Behave accordingly. Relationship Status: Single, not looking. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: NYC Posts: 1,467 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,474 Thanked 7,111 Times in 1,205 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	I'm very much a tomboy, and not a high femme at all, except when I dress up for dates and events. I was at a leather event sharing a hotel room with a butch couple who know me as a femme lesbian, and their friend needed a place to stay for the last day of the event. She was a nice butch with some serious health issues, who was living on a shoestring budget, and not young. Of course she was welcome to stay in the room at no charge since we three had already budgeted and paid. I made her a completely chaste offer of the other half of my queen hotel bed. She said, very strongly, that she preferred to sleep on the floor. She woke up at 4 AM with a serious asthma attack from sleeping on the floor. I demanded that she get up off the floor and sleep on the other side of my bed, threatening that I would sleep on the floor unless she got off it. Thankfully, that did the trick, and she spent a few restful hours in a proper bed. I later asked my roommates what that was about. They had told the asthmatic butch that I was a big old dyke, but she had insisted that she was NOT going to sleep in a bed with a straight woman! She was quite sure of it. I HAD to be straight. WTF? __________________ Cheryl

03-22-2012, 07:26 AM	#9
1QuirkyKiwi Senior Member How Do You Identify?: BBW. Unique femininity that does not encompass the western paradigm. Preferred Pronoun?: Anything Respectful! Relationship Status: Single, Happy, not Desparate or Looking, but Open to Possibilities... Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Europe and Aotearoa on a 5:2 ratio. Posts: 2,308 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,003 Thanked 6,035 Times in 1,617 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I went to lunch with the managing FDs wife and I mentioned about being an invisible Femme (I explained what it meant). She said to me that when we first met when I was a student, she would never have guessed I was gay. She saw me almost like a Porcelain Doll; as innocent! She also admitted that although she’d heard whispers that I was gay, her experiences of gay women were Andro and Butch, so she believed them to be vicious rumours against me because I was well liked there. Fast forward several years to now, having worked closely with everyone, again, she has observed that when I’m eyeing up a Butch, I’m not obvious about it…..it’s subtle. What she has also observed is that, Boi’s, soft Butch’s, Andro’s and other Femmes pick up on my ‘signals’. She still sees me as a Porcelain Doll! This explains why I get a lot of interest from other Femmes. No offence is intended towards Butch’s when I say this; the ‘signals’ that I send out and maybe many of you Femmes who are seen as straight are far too subtle for them to pick up! It seems we need the 4x4s that Cajun dee has suggested! LOL! There’s a new business venture; Cajun dee’s Butch Attention Grabbers! LOL! __________________ What will make the difference to me is your strength of character and what's in your heart...

03-21-2012, 01:31 PM	#14
Christy51274 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: 100% High Femme, Submissive Preferred Pronoun?: Call me whatever you please. Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Feb 2012 Location: Maryland (Somewhere near Baltimore) Posts: 77 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 246 Thanked 246 Times in 57 Posts Rep Power: 3494134	Cajun_Dee, you're a riot! LOLLL __________________ *“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” ~ Winston Churchill ~*

03-21-2012, 01:14 PM	#1
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,829 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	Replace "DUDE" with "FEMME"

03-21-2012, 04:28 PM	#8
Martina Senior Member How Do You Identify?: * Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: * Posts: 4,999 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,409 Thanked 18,283 Times in 4,166 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Butch femme folk think i am too andro to be femme. Yet regular lesbians think i am straight. By the time i have given an andro lesbian enough significant looks for her to get that i am also a dyke, she thinks i am coming on to her. Oh joy.