Poly Relationships

[uniquetobeme]

I am a member of a LGBT group on FB and someone posted a tread asking people to post how they identify and if they were single or taken. I am feeling a bit irritated and invisible that poly is rarely an option, so I asked, 'what about the polyamorous folks' and someone replied that is was "Not normal' and some other stuff, maybe I asked for it by putting it out there, but it kinda hurt my feelings. The group admins addressed it, but I still feel kinda blah about it so I'm venting here. I usually just let stuff I see on FB go, unless I have PMS, so I must have PMS, which greatly lowers my tolerance for ignorance and meanness.

[kittygrrl]

Originally Posted by uniquetobeme

I am a member of a LGBT group on FB and someone posted a tread asking people to post how they identify and if they were single or taken. I am feeling a bit irritated and invisible that poly is rarely an option, so I asked, 'what about the polyamorous folks' and someone replied that is was "Not normal' and some other stuff, maybe I asked for it by putting it out there, but it kinda hurt my feelings. The group admins addressed it, but I still feel kinda blah about it so I'm venting here. I usually just let stuff I see on FB go, unless I have PMS, so I must have PMS, which greatly lowers my tolerance for ignorance and meanness.

you are normal..don't be hurt..if some don't feel it normal..inform, include, be nice, be your authentic self

[Mel C.]

Originally Posted by uniquetobeme

I am a member of a LGBT group on FB and someone posted a tread asking people to post how they identify and if they were single or taken. I am feeling a bit irritated and invisible that poly is rarely an option, so I asked, 'what about the polyamorous folks' and someone replied that is was "Not normal' and some other stuff, maybe I asked for it by putting it out there, but it kinda hurt my feelings. The group admins addressed it, but I still feel kinda blah about it so I'm venting here. I usually just let stuff I see on FB go, unless I have PMS, so I must have PMS, which greatly lowers my tolerance for ignorance and meanness.

I'm thinking the difference between "not normal" and "not the norm" was lost on the person who replied. Then again, "the norm" has different definitions depending on which dictionary you use. Regardless, poly is in the minority and some people have no tolerance for anything with which they aren't familiar. I'm glad the admins addressed it. Maybe you can feel a little better being "normal" in this thread. Who wants to be normal anyway. I want to be spectacular!

[CherylNYC]

Originally Posted by uniquetobeme

I am a member of a LGBT group on FB and someone posted a tread asking people to post how they identify and if they were single or taken. I am feeling a bit irritated and invisible that poly is rarely an option, so I asked, 'what about the polyamorous folks' and someone replied that is was "Not normal' and some other stuff, maybe I asked for it by putting it out there, but it kinda hurt my feelings. The group admins addressed it, but I still feel kinda blah about it so I'm venting here. I usually just let stuff I see on FB go, unless I have PMS, so I must have PMS, which greatly lowers my tolerance for ignorance and meanness.

Let me get this, err, straight. Someone in an LGBT group tried to tell you that your ID wasn't NORMAL?! When the eff did an LGBT group become NORMAL? The point of being in an LGBT group is that we are decidedly not normal, and therefore require a group of likeminded people with which we can bond.

Sheesh!

[uniquetobeme]

I really wanted a sister bond, but it ended up feeling like I had to compete, and I didn't like it at all! My wife and I rarely argue, are kind and loving toward one another and I've worked hard to get through previous baggage and be able to be a partner in a healthy relationship. There was yelling, tension, manipulation and I didn't feel comfortable or safe in that situation. It is nice to see that other people have those bonds. I wanted a loving sister bond, not sibling rivalry!

[girl_dee]

Originally Posted by uniquetobeme

I really wanted a sister bond, but it ended up feeling like I had to compete, and I didn't like it at all! My wife and I rarely argue, are kind and loving toward one another and I've worked hard to get through previous baggage and be able to be a partner in a healthy relationship. There was yelling, tension, manipulation and I didn't feel comfortable or safe in that situation. It is nice to see that other people have those bonds. I wanted a loving sister bond, not sibling rivalry!

i have learned through experience, the hard way, that the sister (or sister- brother which was REALLY tough) bond is even more challenging to maintain the the D/s. i now have boundaries and limits on what i will discuss and answer to, and i am learning to enforce the boundaries. My sister would need to do the same. Sharing too much info can be disastrous.

The other is the sisters have to be honest about their feelings. Trying to hide them, for any reason can bring on festering and then explosions.

Also, i feel it is the responsibility of the sisters to do the best they can to keep the drama away, and handle themselves accordingly. In other words i don't want my Dom having to referee sibling spats that could be avoided.

it is also a very beautiful connection.