Showing scars: what are your relationship fears?

Mel C. · 02-24-2019, 07:40 PM

That new and shiny will wear off.

~ocean · 02-24-2019, 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mel C.

That new and shiny will wear off.

the "new" does wear off ~ hence the inevitable ~ the shiny keeps on shining ~ with a look , a sexy grin , just the way u look ~

girl_dee · 02-28-2019, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mel C.

That new and shiny will wear off.

Oh my love i find you more amazing each day and i can’t wait to grow old with you.... it will always feel shiny and new!

pssst... i have the same fear

~ocean · 02-28-2019, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by girl_dee

Oh my love i find you more amazing each day and i can’t wait to grow old with you.... it will always feel shiny and new!

pssst... i have the same fear

so beautifully said ((((( dee & mel )))))))

rustedrims · 05-24-2019, 06:41 AM

My relationship fears came true and I didn't have to wait long. Best to know now. Small thing called trust and being safe. Lets not forget about my 3 little simple rules that are easy for me to follow.

JDeere · 06-03-2019, 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rustedrims

My relationship fears came true and I didn't have to wait long. Best to know now. Small thing called trust and being safe. Lets not forget about my 3 little simple rules that are easy for me to follow.

This has been a reoccurring theme in my relationships. so I get it.

My main one is still my family, very judgy, no one is good enough for me deal.

RebelDyke · 06-04-2019, 03:11 AM

I admit i have shut down. I dont feel like getting invested in a relationship anymore. One month, 3years, 20 years. Nothing lasts. It is only a matter of time before it ends. Or you have to be highly tolerant.

Not saying this is this way for everyone. Kudos to those who have found a way to make it work. It is just no longer a thing for me. Relationships that is

cathexis · 06-04-2019, 05:59 AM

Relationships are difficult, they require much work and maintenance. Longterm ones tend to get a little easier as you get to know one another's reactions and idiosyncrasies, but like a garden has to tended daily or it will cease to be what you imagined when starting. Both my Partner and I work at our relationship continually, which is how we stayed together and in love for 25 years (in 2 mos). Also, we reinvent or tweak it every now and again. We make minor adjustments, but it has always remained D/s and strong.

cathexis · 05-24-2019, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mel C.

That new and shiny will wear off.

The new and shiny hasn't worn off in 25 years. I consider myself very lucky. We find something new and amazing about one another daily.
Went through two marriages ~10 years each before finding my true other half.
If you haven't found her/him, keep looking. They're out there.

FireSignFemme · 05-24-2019, 08:29 PM

When we were young her mother told mine how upset she was because her daughter had no friends. So my mom volunteered my services - would it really kill me to be nice to her? I don't know, with any luck. Well it almost got me arrested and she was hauled off to jail. Only then did my mother believe it was as bad as I said it was and no I probably shouldn't be forced to be her “friend” anymore.

Years later I got involved with a woman, kept getting the feeling I knew her from someplace but couldn't place where. She denied it. Well turns out she was that girl, all grown up and living with me because I didn't recognize her, but she knew me! She was like a vicious little psycho Chucky doll come to life when we were young, and decades later even more evil. It was like she had time to perfect her craft.

So one of my worries, concerns it that something like that will happen again. And I'd rather be single, single and celibite even for the rest of my life, than ever have anything like that happen to me again. I would like to be in a relationship but only if it's a healthy one, and that might take some work. And, well the older I get the lazier I am. I mean that's not a flattering thing to admit but it's true.

05-24-2019, 06:41 AM	#5
rustedrims Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Northern Ohio close to Lake Erie and ice-cream places Posts: 445 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,125 Thanked 2,555 Times in 368 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	My relationship fears came true and I didn't have to wait long. Best to know now. Small thing called trust and being safe. Lets not forget about my 3 little simple rules that are easy for me to follow. __________________ I don't want to be perfect because if I was then I will loose the ability to learn.

06-04-2019, 03:11 AM	#7
RebelDyke Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: She/Her/Hers...please no male ID..it's insulting Relationship Status: settled and content Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: oz Posts: 2,569 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,574 Thanked 3,223 Times in 1,574 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I admit i have shut down. I dont feel like getting invested in a relationship anymore. One month, 3years, 20 years. Nothing lasts. It is only a matter of time before it ends. Or you have to be highly tolerant. Not saying this is this way for everyone. Kudos to those who have found a way to make it work. It is just no longer a thing for me. Relationships that is __________________ *"Do it trembling if you must, but DO IT!" ~Emmet Fox* "The cave that you fear holds the treasure you seek" Please, cancel my subscription to your issues.

02-24-2019, 07:40 PM	#1
Mel C. Long-time Member How Do You Identify?: WIB - woman identified butch Preferred Pronoun?: Your choice...not really a button for me Relationship Status: ♡ married 1/1/2019♡ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: San Diego Posts: 2,149 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,772 Thanked 6,828 Times in 1,621 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	That new and shiny will wear off.

06-04-2019, 05:59 AM	#8
cathexis Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Trotskyist, Anarcho-syndicalist Preferred Pronoun?: They, Them, Their, Sir Bitch Relationship Status: open Join Date: Sep 2016 Location: Great White North! Posts: 4,332 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,812 Thanked 4,705 Times in 1,604 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	Relationships are difficult, they require much work and maintenance. Longterm ones tend to get a little easier as you get to know one another's reactions and idiosyncrasies, but like a garden has to tended daily or it will cease to be what you imagined when starting. Both my Partner and I work at our relationship continually, which is how we stayed together and in love for 25 years (in 2 mos). Also, we reinvent or tweak it every now and again. We make minor adjustments, but it has always remained D/s and strong.

05-24-2019, 08:29 PM	#10
FireSignFemme Senior Member How Do You Identify?: N/A Join Date: Jan 2016 Location: WA Posts: 4,434 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 37,962 Thanked 10,280 Times in 3,146 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	When we were young her mother told mine how upset she was because her daughter had no friends. So my mom volunteered my services - would it really kill me to be nice to her? I don't know, with any luck. Well it almost got me arrested and she was hauled off to jail. Only then did my mother believe it was as bad as I said it was and no I probably shouldn't be forced to be her “friend” anymore. Years later I got involved with a woman, kept getting the feeling I knew her from someplace but couldn't place where. She denied it. Well turns out she was that girl, all grown up and living with me because I didn't recognize her, but she knew me! She was like a vicious little psycho Chucky doll come to life when we were young, and decades later even more evil. It was like she had time to perfect her craft. So one of my worries, concerns it that something like that will happen again. And I'd rather be single, single and celibite even for the rest of my life, than ever have anything like that happen to me again. I would like to be in a relationship but only if it's a healthy one, and that might take some work. And, well the older I get the lazier I am. I mean that's not a flattering thing to admit but it's true.