Butch & Transmen Friendship: Mutual Support

[Liam]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Code of Ethics.

For me, number one also includes not dating a friend's ex-girlfriend.

I would not say that it is "unethical" to date a friends ex-g.f. per say, and some people may even ask their friend if it would be ok, but for me, I find it best just to see anyone that any of my friends have dated as being "off limits". It just makes things a lot easier.

Anyone else follow this "rule"?

I do, I think it keeps my friendships "cleaner," simpler and most definitely easier.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Liam

I do, I think it keeps my friendships "cleaner," simpler and most definitely easier.

Exactly.

Like Corkey said, it never even enters my head.

[Hack]

Truth be told, I have very few butch friends online or in RT. I tend to not socialize in the queer world in RT. My closest friends are straight males. I had a big falling out with a lot of my butch friends a few years ago while going through a messy breakup that was characterized by one side as something it totally wasn't. There was a perception, I think, that I had done a dishonorable thing, when I really hadn't. Anyway, that whole experience sort of left a bad taste in my mouth. It's only recently that I have welcomed friendship from butches, and I like that I have someone I can talk to who automatically knows the shorthand, as it were. I do plan on being somewhat selective in my friendships based on lessons learned.

Jake

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Hack

Truth be told, I have very few butch friends online or in RT. I tend to not socialize in the queer world in RT. My closest friends are straight males. I had a big falling out with a lot of my butch friends a few years ago while going through a messy breakup that was characterized by one side as something it totally wasn't. There was a perception, I think, that I had done a dishonorable thing, when I really hadn't. Anyway, that whole experience sort of left a bad taste in my mouth. It's only recently that I have welcomed friendship from butches, and I like that I have someone I can talk to who automatically knows the shorthand, as it were. I do plan on being someone selective in my friendships based on lessons learned.

Jake

I, personally, have no real time butch or transguy friends. All of my gay friends are androgynous, and although I love them dearly, I so wish I had someone to have "shorthand" with, in real life.

God knows how I have found femme off line to date. The femmes I have dated (except for once, I only date locally), have never been able to find femme friends, either.

And when it comes to online, I am not really connected to any butches/transguys, either. Has just fallen out that way, for whatever reason?

I am very thankful for b/f/trans space on the internet, however. I certainly get a lot of my needs met just by being on this type of site.

[Kosmo]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

<clip>All of my gay friends are androgynous, and although I love them dearly, I so wish I had someone to have "shorthand" with, in real life.

<clip>

Same here. Sometimes it feels kinda strange. I need to shop around for a butch buddy, lol.