Long Distance Relationships

[TheMerryFairy]

Originally Posted by meridiantoo

Diva,

Thanks for your reply!

The being easily misunderstood part is a huge issue for us at times. When you don't have the eye contact and body language to complete verbal communication, it's really hard to read your partner wrong, and for that to just spiral. We have to do 'reality checks' a lot and that becomes tedious at times. If both people are not true verbal communicators, that only exacerbates the muddy waters.

You know, I am guilty of the unrealistic and selfish expectation of having a fantastic visit each and every time. I am learning to mature in this area and realize it's also about life as it happens and about settling into a routine and lifestyle with someone. When you see one another every day, you don't consciously think about these things, they just automatically get addressed and you move on to the next thing. This is an excellent point you brought up. Thank you!

The uncertainty is HUGE with me sometimes and often, I can't even pinpoint why I feel that way, but I think it has to do with the lack of daily reinforcement. When she is quiet (she's not a strong verbal communicator like I am) I doubt her love and that insults her and discourages her. It becomes a vicious cycle.

More later...I have to get offline for a few...

I agree with the communication. I am pretty good at sensing things through text or over the phone etc but one of my crushes can't really communicate verbally and has a hard time with eye contact. This has led me to adjust my processing a bit but I think if something were to ever come of it, it might work if we took things slow and worked through it.

I process things through my senses which is hard for a lot of people to understand anyway. I can be "overly passionate' at times but I think that is the romantic in me.

[meridiantoo]

Originally Posted by TheMerryFairy

I agree with the communication. I am pretty good at sensing things through text or over the phone etc but one of my crushes can't really communicate verbally and has a hard time with eye contact. This has led me to adjust my processing a bit but I think if something were to ever come of it, it might work if we took things slow and worked through it.

I process things through my senses which is hard for a lot of people to understand anyway. I can be "overly passionate' at times but I think that is the romantic in me.

Merry,

I am the same way - I process through my senses more than anything else. I think it's a gift and a curse, but I have a strong instinct that is highly accurate and I keep learning over and over to trust it and not second guess it no matter what.

Good luck to you if you do the LD thing. It's really not that hard, you just have to be somewhat independent to do it in a healthy way, that's all.