FTM place to vent and talk

[ruffryder]

Originally Posted by Linus

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And there is one thing I was curious about because I've seen this from both sides: I know there are many femmes who are interested/intrigued/turned on by FTMs and many FTMs who are reciprocal to this (myself included). What I'm curious about are those FTMs who are here in this community (and others like it) and interested in straight-women as opposed to femmes in this community (and others like it)?

I am not interested in straight women as opposed to femmes. I see women as women, no matter how they may identify. Some femmes feel invisibility about their identity and "pass" as straight where some FTM may "pass" as straight males also. For me and I guess what I'm trying to say is woman is woman and man is man for sake of the two genders. Of course there are lots of other gender identities and some FTM may not even ID as male but instead transgender, third gender, FTM, etc.. If one is FTM I'm gonna view him as male, just my opinion - "Female to Male" unless he lets me know otherwise.

Anyway, as far as women go (straight or femme) if she has an interest in me and who I am then I'm interested in her and like I've said it's "women" I'm interested in and not how they may identify. I've dated women all across the spectrum from queer, femme, bi, straight, dyke, lesbian. As long as they get me and understand where I'm coming from I have no issues dating any woman across the spectrum (well not now because I'm happily in a relationship ) Do femme women understand FTM better than a straight woman? Maybe, but not in my experience. It all depends how they view the FTM and if you general have decided to share that part of you. We can't assume everyone including our own community knows what an FTM is.

Originally Posted by BrutalDyke

I get what you're saying. All of our friends are straight as well. Comes with territory of area we live in but also the gay folks that do live near there really won't have anything to do with us because of the whole FTM/femme status. I guess they think we're "traitors" to our own kind? Lol. Whatever their deal is, we don't worry about it and actually love our straight friends. Only one of them (Julie's best friend) really gets it I think. The rest just kinda get that glazed over look in their eyes then pretend they never heard any of it. Go figure.

I was born and lived in a small midwestern community, one of the states where Brandon Teena was killed for being a transgender. A lot of my friends were and are straight also. I dated a straight woman for 3 years and we lived together as a couple. Our friends understood us and knew me as the male counterpart in the relationship. They had no issues with it whatsoever. I appreciated their willingness to learn about FTM and their acceptance and it made me happy that if they messed up on a pronoun they were quick to fix that. They saw me as just another guy. Thankfully, I have not run into people that are hateful about it or dont' agree with it. I'm more scared of this happening here in the good ol south of FL. I share my life of an FTM with people that are close to me, employers, some coworkers and others that I trust and want close in my life.

I've ran into femmes that aren't sure about FTMs and how they identify. They have made mistakes calling me her, she, girl.. and It blew me away.. I somehow get more upset when this happens in our own community then if a straight identifying person would mess that up. Has anyone ran into that also? and
another question to you all is, do you think femme women understand FTM better than a straight woman or vice versa? What are your experiences with this?

and.. another question yet, Who do you share that you are an FTM with and do you explain it or do you just let others assume you are butch, lesbian or a straight male or however they may view or perceive you?