Reactions to Embracing Your Femme(ness)

[spritzerJ]

Originally Posted by Cajun_dee

Spritz,

your #3 hit home for me in a way. People, even family often think because we are queer we will embrace their *ism* for something or other.

That's not a femme exclusive thing but it bugs me when people do it.

It used to happen in the work place, for example, they would seem so shocked when i spoke out against the stupidity, like i was a party pooper. We were all friends so they thought nothing was out of line for me.

i was the only (out) queer so they assumed i was safe and the heavy comments came AFTER i came out to them. Like i was a challenge to the men. Yaknow the "she needs a good man " thing.

Not ok!

I want to say that the phenomenon I was referencing is like their internal dialogue was "Hay I "accepted your queer now be fair and accept my -ism".

I'm not usually so grouchy. I just keep trying to mentally scrub myself from the first week back to school and the work BS.

There can be beautiful femme experiences. I've had them with Stoney. Hy takes the time to enjoy my presentation in looks and adores my mind.

When you describe how Syr eats at the truck stop so peacefully that is how I want to feel about being femme. Comfortable enough in how I look so where ever I go my mannerisms convey that there is no point to trying to limit me based on looks. And thus begins the we live in a sexist world carousel in my head.