"Butch" and "Femme" - Truly Antiquated Terms or More Marginalization?

[Apocalipstic]

Thanks for saying that BVD-O, it seems like most of the new terms are not for the more feminine of us. I wonder if its just Femmes who are antiquated.

[Darth Denkay]

The_Lady_Snow - you totally freaking rock - you are femme in all your glory!!!

Apoc - Femme is definitely not antiquated in my book.

Yes, there does seem to be some defensiveness in this discussion, based around perceived fear that we will be erased as a culture. It's understandable. Yes, my hackles raise when I think about butch/femme becoming obsolete. In my case though, it has more to do with losing our history than with my identity in particular. You see, I'm gonna be butch until the day I die (and if there's more after that I'll be butch then too). Regardless of how terms may shift, I will always be a butch - no one can take that away from me. What raises my hackles is a fear that we will lose/forget our history. Butch/femme is what started the lesbian community (lesbians existed long before, but butch/femme created the first organized community). This was in the 1940s. These individuals suffered, were humiliated, and died because they were not ashamed of who they were, and made our lot, as their descendants if you will, so much easier. It's the connection to our past that I am afraid of losing.

[Bit]

Originally Posted by WicketWWarrick

This was in the 1940s. These individuals suffered, were humiliated, and died because they were not ashamed of who they were, and made our lot, as their descendants if you will, so much easier. It's the connection to our past that I am afraid of losing.

It can't be lost now *soft smile* it's right here. Every time we talk about our community and our history, we make it that much more resistant to being erased.

I think the wonder of the internet is that we, all of us together, are writing a history of the human race that will last as long as technology lasts... look at the books which are being put online, the movies, the music, the plays, the art--we as a race are archiving our own history as fast as we are able, to save it all. This is unprecedented, you know. We've never had the capability before, never had a way for an average person to make a mark on history like this, never had a way for entire countries to preserve their culture like this.

And, for what might well be the very first time ever and certainly for the first time in recorded history, OUR culture, our gay, Queer culture, is a huge part of the archive. This is a wonder to me. What an amazing time to be alive, when my words--the words of one small life--can be part of the actual archive of history!

This is our story. We're writing it together, all of us, from everywhere around the world.

[always2late]

I am a Femme. I was born a Femme and was one before I even heard the word. I embrace it and it is how I identify. I looove the term. And I also love the term "Butch", and the Butch/Femme dynamic. I find that it encompasses all that I love about myself, my own identity, and the ID of my partner. However, I do realize that these are my own personal preferences. I would never presume to label anyone with an ID not of their own choosing. I think what it all comes down to is respect. I do not disdain any new manner of identifying, on the contrary, I celebrate and embrace whatever identity one chooses to use to define themself. I just ask that I be allowed the same freedom of expression. No one has to agree with my choice of identity..they just need to respect it.

[Blue_Daddy-O]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Thanks for saying that BVD-O, it seems like most of the new terms are not for the more feminine of us. I wonder if its just Femmes who are antiquated.

Sure Apocalipstic.... I LOVE antiquated Femmes !!!

[LieslKate]

Originally Posted by Blue_Vegan_Daddy-O

Sure Apocalipstic.... I LOVE antiquated Femmes !!!

I love that you love antiquated Femmes