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08-14-2017, 03:00 PM
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#1 | |
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I'm not sure human beings have the capacity to love like this...
Quote:
Wouldn't a love that's indiscriminate ... while seemingly wonderful on it's face... be sort of a ... "cheapened" ... sort of love? Perhaps that's not the ideal word for it. Meaning, if someone loves everyone ... regardless... what value is their love to each individual? Does it mean anything? I do differentiate humans' capacity for love from the capacity of a higher power to love. |
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08-14-2017, 03:58 PM
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#2 |
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Thoughts on loving unconditionally, indiscriminately and selflessly?
A long time ago I would have said yes to all of the above...... However over the years I have learnt some valuable lessons & now I am at.......Those who I bring into my personal circle of life.... I absolutely love unconditionally... I am just selective on who I let into that circle in the 1st place... It's a self protection boundary... If I am hurt by someone I have let in, I find it difficult to connect to them in the same light as I did before & sometimes I do find forgiveness but I love them with a sense of caution if that makes sense? If they deliberately hurt me again I remove them from my life... So in a sense... I guess I do have some conditions on love which I am working on some of those factors.... (How much I am willing to tolerate in my life has a boundary & I find boundaries healthy) Indiscriminately.... I like to think yes, I love peoples uniqueness & believe everyone has something different they bring to the table & there for I love each of them differently for different reasons.... But like everything... I am selective of who I let into that circle because my personal safe boundary is there for a reason & have learnt over the years that whilst your intentions are good... Not everyone else has that same intention..... Selflessly..... No... I did once & it drained the life out of me for many years, by loving someone so selflessly I forgot who I was, I forgot how to be me & enjoy being me.... I was mentally & physically exhausted which is not healthy for any person to be involved with romantically or friendly... When I am in love with someone I love them, but I don't compromise myself anymore... Because I matter too & it's taken me a long time to say those 4 words... I guess boundaries are what always come into play for me... We all have humanity etc but I also think not compromising what makes you healthy & happy should be priority as well... |
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08-14-2017, 04:25 PM
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#3 | |
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Quote:
This part of your post really struck me. I'm just bouncing off that because my idea here might not be quite what you were referring to, but I did like your post. I think as a human being I have both a limited capacity and an unlimited capacity to love. My limits are I only have so much energy, time, strength, courage, etc. and there are also the healthy boundaries several people have discussed. Where the unlimited capacity comes in is I have loved a few people in my life where I did feel my love continue to grow and grow. You think you love someone as much as you possibly can and then the next day you love them even more. Not from some crazy frentic infautation, or because you had great sex the night before or the person did something amazing for you, but just from having that close connection that much longer. To me that is an amazing and beautiful thing. I think a similar thing can happen with loving yourself, loving family, friends or other non-romantic forms of love, loving your art or vocation or calling. So I do think as humans we do have limits to our love and boundaries that are critical, but we also have the unlimited capacity to love when the conditions are right, and that is one of the most amazing qualities that humans have.
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Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other. - Rainer Maria Rilke |
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08-14-2017, 06:06 PM
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#4 | |
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This part of your post really struck me... back!
 The "...when the conditions are right..." is what makes me say I don't believe human beings are capable of ... unconditionally, indiscriminately and selflessly love. And it's true for me too! And it's what I hope is true for my particular higher power. I use the HP term just because not everyone believes the same one. Quote:
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08-15-2017, 10:50 AM
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#5 | |
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Opps... my BFP proofreader just advised me...
 And it's what I hope is not true for my particular higher power. Quote:
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08-15-2017, 12:15 PM
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#6 |
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I feel a little differently...the conditions to love are never perfect..that's just wishful thinking that you may get that perfect person who deserves all your love..we aren't made that way because even in the midst of greatness we are flawed..you just have to take your chances and do your best to make good choices and hopefully you will find a partner (when you are open) who shares your interests and your temperaments compliment each other.
yin (to his) yang
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08-15-2017, 12:24 PM
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#7 |
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I don't think conditions or people (definitely including me) are perfect either. But there are some conditions and people who make it more conducive to having a healthier and deeper love - for me. I connect more deeply and closer to some people more than others - it's just a combination of things that allows it to occur. And someone I might not form a deep connection with can certainly form a deep connection with someone else.
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