About Butches Q & A

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by LipstickLola

Question for you all, does a 'strong' woman, femme in type turn you off?
I'm asking because of something I'm trying to figure out from the past, yeah, I should let it go, but? I'd really like to know if that is a negative to butch women. I'd not change one iota, (am a softy really) but I am what I am, so? just asking

Personally, no. I prefer independent, strong femmes. Where this can get sketchy for me has do do more with things like loudness. But, I am just not one for loud, anyway. Femme or butch.... all other people. It is just a personality style thing for me as a person, myself. i can get really tired of feeling my own voice notch up when trying to have a conversation with someone like this (again, anyone from any identity).

I enjoy gregarious women very much- but that isn't really what I'm talking about- abrasiveness is probably the best description. Again, I don't care for abrasive people- isn't really a femme thing.

I love my older sister to pieces, but, sometimes I need a break from her when we are together- she is rather loud and just has a personality that can take over- cause others to feel that what they have to say isn't important. But, she can hear this criticism. And has given me some pointers as well about how I might come off to other people. My softer persona along with being somewhat reserved might come off as stuck-up. I have to watch this.

[LipstickLola]

Originally Posted by AtLastHome

Personally, no. I prefer independent, strong femmes. Where this can get sketchy for me has do do more with things like loudness. But, I am just not one for loud, anyway. Femme or butch.... all other people. It is just a personality style thing for me as a person, myself. i can get really tired of feeling my own voice notch up when trying to have a conversation with someone like this (again, anyone from any identity).

I enjoy gregarious women very much- but that isn't really what I'm talking about- abrasiveness is probably the best description. Again, I don't care for abrasive people- isn't really a femme thing.

I love my older sister to pieces, but, sometimes I need a break from her when we are together- she is rather loud and just has a personality that can take over- cause others to feel that what they have to say isn't important. But, she can hear this criticism. And has given me some pointers as well about how I might come off to other people. My softer persona along with being somewhat reserved might come off as stuck-up. I have to watch this.

Thank you for that!
I think I hear you, brash is a word I think I'd use in describing abrasiveness too. Although I can be loud if necessary, (my playground voice, lol) it's more the vibe I give off I suppose. I'm 5'8' (was recently told that was tall, ) and as my momma always said, I walk like a linebacker I can't help that, (charm school didn't work).....my point is, that doesn't adequately describe my entire persona, you'd have to actually talk to me to know I'm not that person.

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by LipstickLola

Thank you for that!
I think I hear you, brash is a word I think I'd use in describing abrasiveness too. Although I can be loud if necessary, (my playground voice, lol) it's more the vibe I give off I suppose. I'm 5'8' (was recently told that was tall, ) and as my momma always said, I walk like a linebacker I can't help that, (charm school didn't work).....my point is, that doesn't adequately describe my entire persona, you'd have to actually talk to me to know I'm not that person.

YES! And tall is good! So is short!

Be who you are. As a butch type that usually falls short of many of the butch standards I see sometimes, I know about internal questions and sometime insecurity. But, what I have learned is that both butches and femmes have many different styles and traits. I don't need to fit into any box and I sure don't think that anyone else has to. besides, standards are fluid.