So what does being Bisexual, mean to you ?

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Toughy

Starbuck....

do both your husbands know about the relationship you and your g/f are having?

Back in the day...<cough>... pretty much everyone was on AOL and the message boards through them. The lesbian board was crappy, so I checked out the bi board. Bright, intelligent women! They were cool with me being on there, too. One woman is still a good friend of mine (online..she lives in Utah), but I haven't talked with her in a while.

A lot of the women on this particular board were married and out to their husbands and dated women.

I got together with this one female couple who lived about an hour or so from me. They had gotten together at work. One was actually the others' boss. They have now been together, geez, it has to at least be 15 years. They were both still married and both loved their husbands. Both of their husbands knew and after a period of time were supportive of their relationship (and the women are supportive of each others' relationship with their husband). Periodically, the families would get together.

The other woman (the Utah one), had a similar thing going on (but with a single lesbian). They lived in two different states, but actually had a business together. That one didn't end too well (the single lesbian kind of screwed my friend over). After that relationship, my friend's husband requested she only seek out lovers and no longer have "relationships" with women, as he really struggled with her loving someone else. My friend has been ok with this so far and has been fortunate to find a lover she enjoys in bed, but not so much out of bed...so it works!

For all three of the above women, they have talked about how they really need both sexes in their lives to feel fulfilled.

However, I have also spoken to other bisexual women that say they can be completely fulfilled committed to only one person. I do believe this to be true.

[betenoire]

Originally Posted by Isadora

I think it is about sex. That is why it is called bi-sexual.

Hi, Isa! <3

I am curious if being gay is strictly about sex also? After all, they do call it homosexual. Ditto for straight people, they call it heterosexual.

[Elijah]

Really interesting topic.

I have never ID'ed as Bi because I have never had any doubt about where My attractions lie, but I have dated several people who have ID'ed as such.

For Me, it always made sense that someone who was attracted to masculinity, and who were very self aware and open to connections with all kinds of people, without regard to what is between their legs, may have some overlap.

I think being bisexual has nothing to do with you ability to be fidelitous (if that's what you seek).

I think our own fears as a community have driven some very hurtful and frankly untrue biases about bisexuals.

That's why I am happy and proud to ID as queer, because in general, I think the queer community is much more open to ID's that don't fit into easy little packages, that serve to quell our fears.

As an aside, I think it is important to remember that we can find bad behaviors and personality traits in any group of individuals.

~Elijah